Sunday, March 17, 2013

What's Next For Me,



In this moment I am in with this life I have has been an outstanding new chance to improve my relationship with myself and the things I have broken which I am in the process of healing. This leave I have been on and soul searching I have done has been amazing. It's been allot of hard work and I have faced challenges that I would have walked away before in the passed but I am finding myself able to face and handle them and close chapters of things to move forward.

This life of serenity has become a blessing each any every single day. The love that surrounds me and my children are all that I need. I am blessed with them in my life. I have been seizure free for 2 months now and it's been amazing. Along the way of becoming healthier mentally and physically I have found things to become more clear and able to resolve conflicts I have had by accepting them. I have also lost more weight and feel physically better as days past. I return to work in a week and I am looking forward to that. I am a little nervous about it, but at the same time I get to take things as they come and get back on track with my life and concentrate on my career and provide for myself and my children. 

I still have so much work ahead of me and I am gradually taking things as they come and I know that I am only getting stronger. I know my meds for my epilepsy are working well and I hope to continue seizure free and in 4 months if I am still seizure free I can get my license back and be able to have a more reliable way of getting around even if I have to rent a car occasionally to get around or go visit my children. But I know that's still some time off and I have to concentrate on today. 

I never thought I would end up where I am at right now at the age of 34, but in all reality, I am grateful just to be alive after all the hell I caused. It's a glorious feeling to be in recovery and have the support to manage a better life and feel God working in me. 

I don't know what tomorrow will bring, or tomorrow morning, or next weekend, but I know right now, at this moment, I am ok, content, and grateful. Today I am doing the best I can and I am at ease with that for once in my life. :) 

Saturday, March 2, 2013

3 Weeks

Hey folks, I am happy to announce that I am 3 weeks of being seizure free with has been a god send. its been the longest in a very long time and seems like the medicationss I am on are working now and I am doing great.

This year I am participating in the Sharon Ride Walk Run 2013 even in San Diego event again and am very excited about it. Team Barton raised over $7500 last year towards Epilepsy and I couldn't be happier. Due to some unforeseen medical issues, I was unable to attend the LA even in October of last year but understand that team mates of mine showed up in my behalf to support the cause and myself and I am very thank for that.



This year due to time restrictions our goal is to raise $1500 and I believe that we can accomplish this goal. I ask that you do what you can to participate in any manner by joining the team, sharing this info with friends or family or making a small donation to achieve this goal. This charity raises money for research for children with epilepsy to attend camp to get the proper help they need to get treatment for their level for Epilepsy. I am not just an advocate of Epilepsy, but I too have Epilepsy and was diagnosed with it in November 2012 and still deal with it day to day. I pray daily with hope for a cure for this condition to ride this from our future generations to come into this world to not have to worry about living with this condition as allot of us adults due. Please share this in your local community's to spread the awareness and help in any manner to help for this cause. My Team Barton needs your plead-ages and donations to reach our goal to our commitment of raising funds to continue treatment and provide clinical treatment for youth and a new way of living for our future leaders. 



To join Team Barton or make a contribution, please go to the following site for further information. 
We thank you for your time and commitment for further education in research and understanding this condition.


Hey friends,

Check out http://www.epilepsysandiego.org/ for more information about the Sharon Walk Ride Run 5k in April and come out to support Team Barton Epilepsy-Foundation San Diego. 



Message me or email me at JonathanTBarton@gmail.com. We need people to donate or join the team. It's on'y $25 to join the team and comes with a shirt and a day of fun. This cause means so much to me and I would be honored to have your support. 

Any donation will go a long way. Our goal is $1500 and we are really working hard to achieve this goal. 

Please share this post with your friends and family to get the awareness spread around to others. This is a great cause  I am not only an advocate for this even, I myself was diagnosed with Epilepsy in November 2012. Any support would be greatly appreciated. 

Sincerely,

Jonathan Barton



Please let me know if you have any questions. :) Please share this post on your pages to spread the awareness.

Saturday, February 2, 2013

Another Fall

So in the last couple is weeks I have been having an increase in my seizures. This last Monday I had a petite seizure and happened to be at the top of the stairs and fell 20ft and was knocked out. My head hit the rail and the wall knocking a hole in it. The fire department & paramedics came out, then was immediately places on a backboard & neck collar as they thought I might have broken my neck. I was taken to the ER and was in the neck collar & back board for over 2 hrs. I finally got my CT and XRays results with no fractures or broken bones. I have a concussion along with bruises everywhere and a contusion on the right side of my head. This was a VERY scary event and reminder how careful I have to be. I am seeing a new Nero soon and am hoping to get this controlled. I am so grateful to be able to stand and not have a broken neck or back. Please Support Epilepsy Awareness anyway you can!

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

My 2012 Reflections & Resolutions

My 2012 year can't be summed up in a years time as I have spent the last several years fighting myself and stuck in my head on hurt in my life, my depression and my ignorance to my surroundings.

I have gotten through a lot of my heartache in my life so far in just the last couple of months. I have set things of the past into angels to fly and be set free. I still battle with myself on things I am not proud of, things I am ashamed of and things I wish I would have done better. I can sit here and say that I have lost so much this last year, but it took me losing to gain myself.

Today I am alive and can feel each breathe and emotion that I have. I no longer deny my problems and I choose to acknowledge them and handle them in a better surrounding than I have in the past.

Negative circumstances in life can cause deep depression. Shattered relationships, money problems, accidents...you name it..can drive us into an emotional pit. The negative situations I put myself into allowed me to be present in my life today and be healthier. As I seek a sober life, and a fulfilling desire to live each day for all that it has to offer, I know that I will be ok.

Watch your thoughts, as they turn into action, and your actions turn into choices, and that will lead to defining your character. I can only surrender each day and hit my knees to prayer for strength to be more than I have ever been.

I have created allot of damage in my life and as I begin clearing that wreckage I can only take it as it comes and do the best I can.

Through the last year I have let myself fall deeper into my fears and past which lead me into a downward spiral of my life. In that it became unmanageable and I used excuses for everything rather than truth. I let my Epilepsy consume me and became very selfish to others around me. I became a victim of my own self pity and looked to others to replenish my needs rather than allowing myself to deal with the pain.

Those actions or forever set in stone and cannot be erased, I can only move on and face what I have feared for so long and become accountable for my actions going forward. I cannot change the past, but I can change the choices and actions I make today as I move forward into a stronger healthier life.

Everyday I am faced with conflict and have found my GOD again that I have abandoned so so many years ago. I have found that in my faith of GOD as I see him allows me to no longer fear what I have feared before. As I face challenges I now can address them with maturity, strength and faith.

Although there has been allot of hurt in 2012, there has been allot of good.

Watching my kids grow up, and see them learning and adjusting to life each day they wake up too.

Working with the Epilepsy Foundation and stating Team Barton to raise money for Epilepsy research.

Good memories with friend and family. The best thing of all 2012 is that I ended the year alive and not where I was at 79 days ago. These last 79 days have been the most challenging and humbling experience of my life, and the hardest. But as I get through each and I lay my head down at night, I know for the day I was ok, and for each day that had yet to come....I will still be ok and be able to manage my life with new surroundings, new experiences and new challenges, and through it all...again I will be ok.

Thank you 2012 for teaching me so much and allowing me to move on into a better life. A healthy brain brings a better life, one day at a time.

Thank you to those that choose to support, pray, and stick with me through my challenges. I realize now that I am loved, I am cared for, and I am living alive inside myself.

As i write this tonight, I noticed with the moon that with the New Year it stays the same. Some changes will remain the same and there will be new changes forced upon us, please think about your choices.

For this new year I have resolutions achieve.

1) Quit Smoking
2) Be a better father
3) To live in the moment
4) To be patient, loving and grateful for what I do have and stop thinking of what I don't have.
5) Move into my own place so I can provide a home for my 3 kids
6) To stop being negative and find the positive in things
7) To return to work and work hard.
8) obtain a car
9) Make better choices, be thankful for life.
10) To walk with my GOD, and not get into my heard.
11) Control my existence and be strong in my recovery.

No more looking back.......Thank you for all your support.

May your new year be a spectacular one! Bring it on 2013, I am ready. Best wishes!!